How You Can Prevent “Homeschool Homicide”

Guest Post by Irmari Basson & Allison Seller, Founders and Partners, Rise Women Wellness

There are many reasons why parents choose not to homeschool. It is not possible with work commitments, educational needs, personality clashes, or perhaps the real fear of not being good enough or having the patience required. 

Or maybe the even bigger fear is that being with your kid 24 hours a day could result in a “homeschool homicide”. We get it. It might be best for everyone’s safety to just send them to school for as many hours as legally possible.

But then the Spring of 2020 happened and with no say in the matter homeschool became the only school.

Having homeschooled my kids for 4 years in the past, and my business partner having homeschooled her kids for 4 days, we can relate, and recognize the fears and the struggles.

I will never forget our first homeschool day: I thought I had it all together. Family schedule planned to the minute, projects laid out, lunches prepped, kids excited – until reality hit and I realized that my then-18-month-old was not remotely interested in working with our plans. Everything went wrong, and I fell apart when hubby walked through the door, doubting every decision I have ever made in my life. 

Related: The Benefits of Journalling

We got through the trial period and soon found our “realistic” rhythm. Trust me, I speak from experience: I most definitely know the need for support, grace and self care, but I also know what needs to be done to succeed at this. 

1) Make yourself a priority.

The number one most important thing you as a new homeschool parent can do for yourself and your children, is to make yourself the most important priority. Yup, I said it! Right now is the time to care for yourself and make yourself the best possible version of you. Self care is not selfish and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. You are making buckets full of sacrifices right now and you are doing it for your community, your country and most importantly for your children. 

2) Focus on your relationship with your kids.

Let’s get the focus right. Yes, your kid’s education is partially in your hands right now, but you don’t have to create an Einstein or skip a grade in the next few months. Your child is not ahead or behind. Your child is exactly where they need to be right now. The most important thing you can focus on right now is your relationship with your kids. You get to spend extra time with them and before you know it, they will be off at activities with full schedules again. You remain their parent first. Patience, love and care are the most important things your children need from you right now. 

3) Make sure your “love bucket” is always full.

But how do we do that when overwhelming and unrealistic expectations are so real right now?

You make sure your love bucket is full at all times. If your love bucket runs dry, there is no more for you to give and that is when we do things we later regret.

Our love buckets are full when all 4 pillars of health are attended to: physical, mental, spiritual & nutritional health. These are the areas which create balance, joy, purpose and strength.

Here are 4 tips on how to fill your love bucket:

  1. Mental Health: Do something for yourself. Even if it’s just 20 minutes. Block out the time. Do something that makes you feel relaxed. Read a book, sunbathe in peace outside, run a nice bath with candles and bath salt.
  2. Physical Health: Move your body, whether it is with or without your kids. It can be a workout or a simple casual walk around the block. Breathe deeply.
  3. Spiritual Health: Take time to read a scripture, meditate, listen to music, or pray. 
  4. Nutritional Health: Make a nutrient dense salad for one meal every day. Make it pretty, in a favourite bowl, with your favourite ingredients that give you energy. And remember to fuel up on water.

You became a parent to your kids for a reason. You are the best person to walk this journey with them. You can do this! 

Rise Women Wellness helps women in South Delta and the Greater Vancouver Area uncover how to balance life and rise to their best physical, nutritional, mental, and spiritual health. They offer workshops, 21 day resets, and wellness resources.


For more great activities, tips and resources, check out our latest issue! You can read the full March/April issue online here.

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